Huttastic Jabbas and Where to Find Them

Han SoloandObi-Wan Kenobihave their own forthcoming standalone/spin-off movies, so why not other characters from the Star Wars universe? Makes sense, right? This may explain Disney & Lucasfilm’s nonsensical decision to develop a Jabba the Hutt movie.

There is no director or writer attached at the moment since the project is just in development stages. I can only assume they will attempt some sort ofGodfather-esque space mafia movie. Bib Fortuna is a consigliere like Tom Hagen, and Salacious Crumb thinks he’s Sonny but is really just Fredo.

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Who am I kidding? This will probably be some schlocky piece of garbage like Brian De Palma’sScarface. Which is a perfect opportunity to post this training montage fromThe Turkish Star Warssynced to “Scarface (Push It to the Limit)”.

There are so many other Star Wars spin-off movies I’d rather see. A movie about Wedge Antilles and Rebel Alliance fighter pilots would be keen, for instance. Or a movie about Chirrut (Donnie Yen) and Baze (Jiang Wen) fromRogue One: A Star Wars Storywould be pretty fun.

Superman, Elio, and Glordon all looking up

Sure, Jabba the Hutt is a familiar name, but who wants to watch a movie about him? He’s just this amphibious space-slug. An obese, sleazy, slimy, trashy, power-hungry, misogynistic despot with an inflated sense of entitlement.

On second thought, the movie seems pretty timely given certain figures in the news.

Three characters walking through red water with a massive dinosaur looming over them in jurassic world rebirth next to a boy riding a black dragon in how to train your dragon

As a fast food tie-in, the Jabba the Hutt movie may take a cue fromSpaceballsand reach out to Pizza (the) Hut. Who knows–maybe Jabba can release a bad Pizza Hut-exclusive album like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles did withComing Out of Their Shells.

Do you look forward to a Jabba the Hutt movie? Are there any spin-offs you’d rather see instead? Have you pushed it to the limit or said hello to someone’s little friend? Chime in below.

Steve, Garrett, and Henry standing on a bridge in front of a Woodland Mansion in A Minecraft Movie.

You will soon learn to appreciate the Jabba The Hutt spin-off in development[The AV Club]

Five A Minecraft Movie characters standing in a blocky Minecraft forest with a dog.

A Minecraft Movie cast standing together in Minecraft

The Fantastic Four standing in front of a large blue four in Marvel’s The Fantastic Four: First Steps film.

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The Fantastic Four and Thunderbolts teams from Marvel